Heath Ledger's death was seriously too shocking for me to handle. I was totally shocked and speechless when I found out about it. Its like, I cant believe he died. Truth to be told, he's is the last person I would think about when it comes to young and early deaths. Sigh, may his soul rest in peace and I will always remember the movie '10 Things I Hate About You', which I watched more than 10 times >_<
His death, though, made me realize that life is indeed bloody short and we better make full use of it before its too late. It also opened up my eyes to many possibilities. Read on.
Lately, I find myself feeling very thirsty. The thirst is like as if I've never drank for 10 years. My instinct tells me that this isnt very normal but I'm planning to pretend that its normal. So, last night I casually told my Mom 'Dunno why but I'm always thirsty,' and thats when she asked me to becareful because it might be diabetes. Shit, what if I do have diabetes? Will I die? But then again, I'm having the monthly visit so could it be the hormones making me like this or what? See, usually before the visit, I'll eat damn a lot and always have cravings for ice cold water. So, I'm hoping that its the hormones.
Anyway, back to diabetes. I couldnt help thinking about it. Honestly, I am worried that my body system is probably wrecked and thats why I dont like seeing the doctor too often in case I found out a little too much information. So, because of this thought, my mind started working.
What if I get diabetes?
What if my leg or toe gets chopped off because of the diabetes?
What if I die because of it?
Then from there, I started thinking about death...
What if I die at an early age?
What if I die without experiencing the true meaning of life?
What if I die before achieving my goals and dreams?
What if I die even before experiencing a real relationship?
What if I die before getting myself my dream job?
What if I die before getting married with the one I love?
What if I dont live long enough to have children?
What if I dont live long enough to see my children have children?
What if I dont live long enough to see my grandchildren play?
What if, huh? What if.
So, do y'all see where I'm heading to? As in, the connection with Heath Ledger? Okay, guess not. Anyway, my point is if Heath Ledger or anyone else in this world can die at such a young age, what about me? There is a 50-50 possibility but I certainly hope that God will give me a big amount of years to live and make the best out of it.
Live life to the fullest, y'all.
xoxo
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